Title Unknown
Reposted-

I think it's safe to say that everyone has a friend who isn't a friend anymore. If you don't, then consider yourself blessed or lucky. Whatever it is, be thankful you haven't experienced the pain, hurt, or drama surrounding a failed friendship. Maybe it's not so much a failed friendship, but a misunderstanding. Or maybe it wasn't ever real. Maybe it wasn't a two-way street. Maybe one friend used the other. Whatever the relationship was, whatever the ending, most people can think of at least one person when they hear about a friendship that is no more.
When a friendship ends, it usually ends in pain, drama, and awkwardness. Much like a band-aid, at some point you have to rip it off. Stop fighting or stop caring. Issues probably go unresolved. Feelings probably continue to be hurt. Sides continue to hold strong. If you're like me, you spend a lot of time thinking about nothing but the failed friendship. You exert a lot of energy to thinking about the situation, replaying conversations, and deciding what you would say if you saw this person again. You spend days upon days thinking about nothing else. Some of you may talk to others about it, whether it's another friend who was involved, someone outside of the situation, or a significant other. Some of you may keep it all in. I won't pretend to know what goes into keeping it in; that's not who I am. I like to talk things out. I need to vent. I need someone to tell me I'm right (or wrong). I need someone on my side.
When people stop being friends, various steps are taken. In the current social media world, Facebook friendships are deleted. That's when you know the friendship is really over. Or maybe you stay friends so you can stalk the person. After all, you want to know what they are up to. Maybe you want to compare yourself to them. Or maybe you want to know what they are up to or who they are hanging out with. Either way, if someone deletes you as a Facebook friend, then you have even more fuel to add to your fire. It's a bold statement that says, "I don't like you anymore."
With so many people having blogs now, you can always keep up on life by following them online. Most of the time they can figure out that you're there lurking behind your computer. But, who cares because you can see them doing it to you too. Sometimes you filter your messages or write them directly at them. Sometimes you post topics to make them jealous. Or sometimes you hold back information so they won't know everything. Either way, you know they are out there watching. As a way to life, I try to not do any of the above. I write to write and don't make a habit of changing the way I live my life to please, upset, or cause harm to others.
Unfortunately, or fortunately for the snoopy person, the online world gives a false feeling of relationship. It makes a person think they have a right to know what is going on with the other person. It makes them think they are still involved in that life. But, in reality they have lost their opportunity to be a part of that life. They have lost their position to ask questions and talk to that person about personal things. They aren't privy to personal information. But, since they get some personal information via the Internet, it feeds off of the feelings associated with the ended friendship. It makes a person want to know more. It makes them do things that they wouldn't have done. It makes them think they are justified in sending an email or making a phone call or sending a text or stopping by. It creates a false justification in their mind because they feel like they still know that person. But, in reality it's a false image in their mind. The other person may give a second chance, but the truth comes to light very quickly. It's very easy to tell if someone is trying to rekindle a relationship or if they are just searching for more information. It's easy to tell when jealous is driving the actions. A true friend, regardless of the mess that caused the fight, will whole-heartedly seek you out. They won't compare lives or talk about materialistic things. A true friend will ask how you're doing, tell you they've missed you, and ask about your family. A true friend will show their good intentions. And if you can't read those good intentions, your gut will tell you it's all wrong.
Don't let yourself fall privy to the effects of the online world. Don't turn into that jealous Internet stalker who makes up reasons to drive by a house or find out information through other sources. As they say, it takes two to tango so if a friendship ends you are also to blame. Act in a manner that would make your mother proud and wouldn't shame your grandmother.